After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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