singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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