when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
