Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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