She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Randomize
