butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
