You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
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