Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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