My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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