Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
