so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
