Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
