there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
