my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
