the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Randomize