U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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