I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
