you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
