Ketchup is God's man juice
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
