i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
