I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
they're like a gay fantastic four
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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