Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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