she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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