I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
