is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Randomize
