wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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