Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Randomize
