How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
