It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
