you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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