We're facebook friends in real life
I just made out with a guy for $7.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
