dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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