i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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