1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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