I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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