Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
