I think I died a long time ago.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
