So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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