Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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