Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
