Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
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