this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
