hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
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