theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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