U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Are my feet made of real feet?
i drank out of a bidet.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
You need a sexual gate keeper
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Randomize
