I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Randomize
