He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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