Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
