I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
