This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Randomize
